It's a good time for some end-of-the-week humor, and our favorite satirical publication, The Onion, delivers. Since there's no point trying to one-up them on humor, we'll just give you the opening line and encourage you to check out the rest of the article:
Years of controversy were finally settled Monday after DNA tests conclusively proved that Duane Panovich, an attraction at the Phoenix Zoo for the past 11 years, was indeed a human being, and not a reticulated giraffe from southwestern Kenya.